Mandarin with Mijia

Here are some interesting Mandarin-isms I've gleaned from studying and would like to share with you...

子宫
zi gong:  baby palace
uterus


学生
xue sheng:  study birth
student


龙虾
long xia:  dragon shrimp
lobster


吃醋
chi cu:  eat vinegar
jealousy when your girlfriend talks to another boy


吃苦
chi ku:  eat bitter
suffer


吃喜酒
chi xi jiu:  eat happy wine
attend a wedding reception


生气
sheng qi:  raw air
very angry


男
nan:  the top half of the character is a field (tian), the bottom is strength (li)
man


电影
dian ying:  electric shadow
movie


红绿灯
hong lv deng:  red green light
intersection


坏蛋
huai dan:  broken egg
a scoundrel


冷笑话
leng xiao hua:  cold joke
corny joke


网球
wang qiu:  net ball
tennis


熊猫
xiong mao:  bear cat
panda


你太二了！
ni tai er le:  you are so two
"You are such an idiot!"


好好学习天天向上。
hao hao xue xi tian tian xiang shang:  good good study, day day up
Mao Zedong's proverb that faithful study will improve your life. 


公安
gong an:  public peace
police


没关系
mei guan xi:  no relationship
"No worries." 


牛仔裤
niu zai ku:  cowboy pants
jeans


野餐
ye can:  wilderness food
picnic


慢走
man zou:  walk slowly
"Take care." What Chinese hosts say when their guest leave. 


笔记本
bi ji ben:  pen remember book
notebook


土泥
tu ni:  potato mud
mashed potatoes


大灯
da deng:  big light
In English we say, "third wheel" when someone is getting between lovers, in Chinese, it's like shining a big obnoxious light on something that wants to be in darkness.


扫兴
sao xing:  sweep away spirit
disappointed


小菜一碟儿
xiao cai yi die'er:  little vegetable on a small plate
"Piece of cake." 


变色龙
bian se long:  change color dragon
chameleon


左右
zuo you:  left right
about


专心
zhuan xin:  professional heart
concentrate


火山
huo shan:  fire mountain
volcano


吃她的豆腐
chi ta de dou fu:  eat her tofu
You can use this phrase if a guy is flirting with a girl and doesn't have holy intentions. 


水龙头
shui long tou:  water dragon head
faucet


成熟
cheng shu:  develop ripeness
mature


圣灵
sheng ling:  Holy Spirit
What's cool about the ling character, is that the top radical (part of the character) is a mountain and bottom radical is fire. Pentecost!


I'll keep studying the oddest, funniest, most useless Chinese over here so that you can learn a bit about Chinese culture and have a healthy giggle.


Your friend,

米佳
mijia:  excellent rice
my name

Chinglish of the Week

If you're looking for unforgettable Chinglish, go to the urinals. 

Bove

Chinese people don't wear deodorant.

Which means a few things:  the scent of a crowded subway should never be made into a candle; and if you go through your deodorant ration in China, you're in a ripe situation.

I was in that situation a few weeks ago.

 I felt the plastic edge scrape my pit during application and thought, "Alas, the sun has set and the stench of night has dawned."

I was in Hangzhou when this happened. Hangzhou (a blend of Door County and New York) is a small city of 11 million in southern China where my sister Hannah teaches and lives. Thankfully she had a stash of Dove under the sink.

I borrowed a stick that I don't plan on returning.

I smelled like bove (b.o. + Dove) for a week until my generous roommate Mike loaned me a stick of Old Spice.

I'm renting with an option to buy.

Micah 米佳

Come Again to Camiguin

Friends,

Over Chinese New Year, I traveled to Vietnam and the Philippines. I've been to both countries before, but for a slew of reasons the Philippines keeps pulling me back.

Maybe it's the delightful rotisserie chicken?
Maybe it's the blue skies that I don't see here in the Jing?
Maybe it's sunshine that de-pale-ifies my flesh?
Maybe it's the fact that Filipinos have phenomenal English?
Maybe it's because I've been treated like a dearly loved son by a Filipino woman named Filomina, who I nicknamed, "Filomama."

Whatever it is about the Philippines, I'll keep going back. The island I went to the past two Februaries is called Camiguin.

I couldn't help but come back again to Camiguin.

If you would like, I've uploaded more pictures to Google+. You can access that album by clicking on the link, "Micah's Online Albums" to the right.

My favorite pic of the trip - a moonlit firefly watching boat ride down a river. The trees were moving with this yellowish glow. It was like a scene out of Avatar. It was one of those moments in life when what you're seeing is so awesome, words can't suffice. 

The best part of the trip was traveling with my best fried - Sissy. She lives and works in Hangzhou, China. Having her only a text or call away has been refreshing. I wouldn't want to travel for a month in Asia with anyone else (Robin Williams would be a close second). 

Some Filipino kids that lived on a pretty isolated island. Our scuba diving boat stopped here for lunch, so we got to hang out with them for a bit. Every time I go to an exotic place, I realize all humans are the same underneath. We all bleed red, we all need love, we all feel pain, we all love food, we all greedy, we all are forgiven. 

This church is called, Sea and Sun. It is perched on the edge of a volcano and has the most breathtaking view of any church in the world - palm trees and turquoise ocean. Last year I came here to worship and they welcomed Dan Tyrrel and I back with open arms. They asked us to preach a sermon and lead their Friday night youth group. It was a blast and a blessing!

Nate, myself and Filomama on the summit of Hibok Hibok - Camiguin's nastiest volcano. We hiked for about four hours through muddy rainforest with huge packs on our back. After slipping and sliding we made it to the top but couldn't see a thing because we were in the clouds. We camped that night in the caldera. It stopped raining just enough to see the stars from within a volcano. Kind of surreal. 

Meet Tin Tin ... my savior.

Tin Tin is a scuba diving guide at a resort on the island. Sissy dove everyday, but I only went  one day. I like scuba diving - the awe just outweighs the anxiety. Anyway, Sissy and I went down with this guide named Max. He was not a great guide. He didn't brief us on the boat about our dive plan, we just jumped in. And then we went deep, really deep - 27 meters (88.5 feet). This is way too deep for novices like Hannah and myself. We are scuba certified, but should not be led that deep. I felt fine during the dive, but I tend to be quite the oxygen sow. I go through my air quicker than John Candy went through a box of twinkies. I would always ascend 15ish minutes before Sissy. Anyway, I motioned to Max when I had 90 bars of air left (about half a tank) and again at 60 bars (about time to start ascending). But he didn't seem to care. As he is inspecting the hue of coral, I'm down to 30 bars. It's getting more and more difficult to breathe.

Gently plug your nose right now and then try to inhale. That's how it felt, but about 35 feet underwater.

I can't shoot up because then you've got the bends to worry about, so I start to panic. Max saw another guide was slowly bringing another big white dude do the surface, so he put me in Tin Tin's care. I show Tin Tin my air gauge and he sees I'm at 20 bars (in the danger zone). He swims over to tell Max about the predicament. Mind you, these conversations are taking place underwater. It's like doing sign language while wearing mittens - not the clearest or quickest way to communicate. As those guys are talking with their fingers and eyebrows I take my last laborious sip of air and prepare to meet my Maker. Tin Tin turns and makes eye contact with me. He must have seen that good 'ol fashioned, "I'm going to die in 57 seconds" look in my eyes. I also made the, "Dude, I'm really out of air" sign with my hand frantically slicing my neck. He slowly swims over, makes the universal, "Calm down bro" with both hands and then slowly unclips his octopus (his second emergency breathing regulator) and hands it to me. I shove it into my mouth and drink deeply. Tin Tin not only borrowed me air but borrowed me life.

 I didn't dive any more after that and don't know if I will. But whenever I saw Tin Tin the rest of the week, I would just point at him with admiration and he would shake his head and smile, as if saying to himself, "Yeah, I know what your eyes look like when you're staring at death. No need to tip me, I just saved your life."